The 2005 California Governor’s and First Lady’s Conference for Women and Families, held on Thursday, October 27 in Long Beach was an overwhelming experience that left indelible and historic memories. Not least was the hour-long discussion between Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor and Barbara Walters, who has interviewed so many high-profile individuals in her long career. Both women were, of course, pioneers in their fields. That is to say, they fought for every yard of ground they conquered. And on October 27, 2005, Barbara Walters met her match in the warm intelligence and quick wit of Sandra Day O’Connor. The discussion brought the house down time and time again.
Maria Shriver, whose non-partisan conference it actually was, is an independent, beautiful, dynamic, unstoppable woman with so much drive and humanity. She is her own person first. Next, she is a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, and a friend to those who have come to know her. She and her parents (Sargent Shriver and Eunice Kennedy), along with her siblings, exemplify the caring of the Kennedy clan for the downtrodden and powerless. And they have done more than care; they have done something concrete about it.
Millions now have a voice, have a future, and are regarded as worthwhile human beings because of the long list of volunteer organizations and legislation Maria’s family has nurtured. For example, Katie Cortelyou of Best Buddies is “a face and a voice for those with intellectual disabilities.” She stunned the audience of 11,000 with her self-confidence and her speaking ability. So much courage was needed and she demonstrated it! And Katie does this over and over again, wherever she is invited to speak.
On the practical side, Maria won the hearts of most attendees by wearing running shoes with her black dress, for the entire day! And it was incredibly long, a full 12 hours+ at the Long Beach Convention Center itself. (Many, many volunteers were probably up at 3:30 a.m.) Let’s thank the good Lord that someone in the public eye had the commonsense to wear comfortable shoes, instead of ruining her feet, legs and back!
Tom Brokaw stated that he was Maria’s idea of gender diversification, as he began his remarks prior to moderating a morning panel. And several other fine male speakers were there—Deepak Chopra and Pastor Rick Warren come to mind—but it was Ladies’ Day. Incredible stories of overcoming obstacles were told by most speakers. It seems to me that the worse we are treated as children, the higher we can expect to fly as adults. Keep that in mind when the insults keep coming at you, year after year. And think Richard Bach’s Jonathan Livingston Seagull and Blaine M. Yorgason’s Ascending, since we continue growing through all our trials.
The main Exhibition Hall was an extremely busy place, with vendors from BP to Ameriquest Mortgage, to Long Beach Memorial Hospital, to Yahoo, to Hyundai, to Starbucks, to law enforcement agencies, and scores more. A Volunteer Village highlighted the dozens of organizations who put in thousands of hours every year to help those less fortunate. Just as I can’t recount everything I heard, I also couldn’t get to more than half of the booths. So much was happening in the conference sessions. I slept for almost ten hours that night myself. I imagine those who did all the work slept far longer than that.
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There are distinct financial advantages to paid overtime on one’s day job. However, it can play havoc with a writer’s creative time, particularly when publishers’ deadlines creep ever closer. And when the OT is declared mandatory and announced half an hour before quitting-time the day before, the internal reaction is less than joyful. Obviously, I can’t go into the reasons the employer has allowed itself to get into this situation, but an unwillingness to hire a sufficient number of employees bears more than a slight relationship.
As writers, we are faced with many roadblocks to achieving our goals. Other people stealing our time is just one of them. Another possibly huge obstacle is lack of moral and practical support from those who don’t think we have much talent to begin with. I could cheerfully slap the people who have asked, “Why you? Why were you invited? Are you a family member?” Or they have made other thoughtless, even spiteful comments, as I got ready to attend various conventions, conferences, book festivals, and even funerals. I have been told on good authority that my response should immediately be “Why not me?! I’m as good as anyone else out there.”
If we don’t really want to write, slings and arrows will stop us dead in our tracks every time. They will shred every piece of self-esteem we’ve ever cobbled together over the years. Very few people are born full of confidence. And the few that were so launched, tend to be so full of conceit that we can’t stand them. Normal self-confidence is a learned trait. We gain it one baby step at a time, even as adults.
To keep moving forward as writers, we may end up writing something for the interim that isn’t at all what our goals are all about. But exercising the muscles of the brain is critical, if we are to retain the flow. It can be e-mails, complaint letters, essays, or a daily journal. We can write short stories, while the novel marinates and our viewpoints mature.
Everything we do changes us. We are different now than we were an hour ago. Every book we read widens our outlook on the world. Hopefully, we are wiser and more compassionate, based on everything that happens in our lives. It is the small events, the turning aside to check the hedgerow and the streambed, that shape our eventual destiny. Do we care enough about life to write about it, to do something about what we see? Do we want to write, or do we just want to have written?
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It’s been a heavy week in some ways. A friend is terminally ill, although I won’t invade the family’s privacy by posting details. And there have been terrible mudslides and flooding, and now a massive earthquake in the world. There is no shortage of opportunities to do something to help others who have lost so much. For that matter, there never was a lack of options to help out. We can all do something. If there is no money to spare, we can put in our time, or donate unused belongings that are in good condition.
Watching a friend or anyone suffer so much from a terrible terminal illness really puts the petty, spiteful, backbiting skirmishes and turf protection of the corporate world right where it belongs, on the bottom rung of life’s priorities. Will the business world never learn that humanity is its business? Will it never learn that humanity begins with its own employees? While some corporations give to largesse for charitable causes, that kindly attitude can be in woefully short supply in their day-to-day treatment of their own rank-and-file. Beware the company that is executive-driven, instead of being employee-oriented.
I hate to think that Charles Dickens was writing about social problems that are still with us, but that’s the view from the crow’s nest. (And yes, the crows are beginning to come back, but they are too smart to convene the entire community, until the air is healthy enough for their lungs.)
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The Chatsworth and Thousand Oaks fires–officially called the Topanga Fire–are not yet fully contained, but thankfully, they are not now the threat that they were either. Unfortunately, many weary firefighters have had to be reassigned to the growing Burbank fire that is almost certainly caused by arson. (The cause(s) of the Topanga fire, which appears now to have burned 24,000 acres near heavily-populated areas, is still under investigation.) We are also still hearing helicopters, as they fly back and forth over the Topanga Fire.
I am one of those “hard-hearted” people who feel no compassion whatsoever for arsonists and the “thrill of it all” for them. I frankly don’t care what’s going on in their disarranged minds, or that they had a deprived childhood. Many millions of people had less-than-perfect, even miserable, childhoods but they didn’t, and don’t, go out and set fires to destroy what isn’t theirs in the first place.
We are immensely fortunate that this time no human lives have yet been lost. In addition, highly trained and coordinated firefighters from many communities across California worked together to save more than 2,000 homes in the veering path of the raging Topanga Fire! Sadly, for many people, their losses have no price tag. Some few this time will grieve for decades over priceless heirlooms that can never be replaced. Many more will mourn missing pets, and devastated wildlife populations that burned to death or died of smoke inhalation.
We noticed late yesterday that the hummingbirds and mockingbirds are back–though from where, we don’t know. We haven’t yet seen the house sparrows, the blue jays, the phoebes, or the tiny finches I still haven’t identified. We don’t even hear the raucous, nattering conventions of the crows, as they discuss the state of the universe or chase invaders away. The silence is unnatural. We haven’t yet seen Momma Possum or her babies, but they probably found refuge and survived. There are no carcasses in the backyard, after all.
Yet most of those wild animals still alive in the area will now starve to death because there is no food and only a little water for them. The deer will be too weakened to migrate very far in their search for food. The coyotes, mountain lions, bobcats, and possibly, black bears will now venture even more boldly into residential neighborhoods–particularly in the San Fernando Valley–because they are so hungry. This means cats and small dogs are at even higher risk for being snatched, so owners must keep them inside. It’s necessary to supervise small children at all times.
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Click here for my view on the rebuilding of New Orleans, while the link is still active.